A Love Letter To Me

Dear baby Ki,

You’ve guided me through some great memories and some terrible nightmares. But through it all, you’ve stood up for yourself and been the voice of others who couldn’t. But there are several fears that you’re still holding onto that I know you’re ready to let go of. They no longer serve us. 

1. You don’t have to worry about not having money to not be able to take care of yourself. You have skills, drive, and a God that will bless you with more than enough prosperity. Look around you, you’ll see it in the home you provide for your son.

2. You don’t have to do it alone anymore, you have friends and family who will be there for you if you allow them too. They won’t use it against you. They’ve shown you by hugging you through the tears, cheering for you when you didn’t believe you could.

3. You have the capacity to love, just look at your son. He is an example of what love looks like. You’re a great fucking mother. I know this because HE’S told you.

4. Don’t hold onto your circle of friends so tightly, old friends will leave so that new ones will come. It’s ok that they left, wish them well and enjoy that friendship for what it was at that time. 

5. Love will come, you’re lovable, no matter what they said or how they made you feel. Who the fuck are they? People love differently, it’s about you loving yourself. Love on you with the same care that God loves on you.

6. Enjoy luxury/riches in your own way. Bags, shoes, & cars aren’t your thing but new experience are. So go on the vacations, create a new experience, and be open to new opportunities. Be selfish with you simply because you want it and deserve it.

7. Don’t push your dreams or goals down to fit in. Keep dreaming big. I’m having the hardest time trying to revive your desires because you didn’t believe you could have it all. You can. Look at what we’ve accomplished so far, it’s time to step into the future version you’ve dreamed of.

8. I know that you’re not a daddy’s girl, but learn to be. God is always waiting for his favorite child to come to him so that he can fix all her problems. Go to him, often. Talk to him, find comfort in his arms, he’s been there when no one else was. He’s got you, trust me, and trust him.

So baby Ki, those fears have been replaced by new truths. The first 42 years of our life has been a true learning experience, the next 42 let’s enjoy being fierce as fuck and living it unapologetically. 

I LOVE YOU, you can enjoy life in it’s simplest form, happiness. I’ve got us from here.